Songs to Sing at Children

by Mike Phirman

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about

NOT ONLY should this be a fun album to listen to while walking, driving, or rollerskating, if you start reading Virgil's "Aeneid" right when the first cymbal crashes, the coincidences are craaaaaaazy!

credits

released May 17, 2018

For Milo & Eli

All songs written, produced, and performed by Mike Phirman

With...

YOU'VE GOT WHAT IT TAKES
Milo Phirman as "Kid Who, It Turns Out, Has What It Takes"

WHAT MAKES THE BREAKFAST
Additional Vocals by Angel Moore-Tanksley

ARMPITS
Additional Vocals by Dannah Phirman

BANANA SAID WHOOPS
Vocals by Dannah Phirman

IN YOUR BIZ
Dannah Phirman as Neighborhood Scientist
Paul Cherwick as Gardener
Danielle Schneider as Doctor
Eli Phirman as Little Marimbist

DANCE, LITTLE MEATBALL, DANCE
Additional Vocals by Diana Feria
Mixed by Justin Hergett

NEVER GONNA HAPPEN
Milo Phirman as Little Waffle Wanter

BABY IS GOING TO SLEEP
Eli Phirman as a baby as A Baby

USE YOUR IMAGINATION
Drums by Tony Thaxon
Drums recorded by Frankie Siragusa at theLAB Studio
Additional Vocals by Theresa Patten-Koeckert
Spanish Voiceover by Rafael Sigler
"Awesome!!" & "Alright!!" by Milo, Eli, Dannah, and Kate Micucci

HAVE YOU GOT WHAT IT TAKES? (INTERSTITIALS)
Rollie Cherwick (Doctor), Jenny Betts & Noelle Zodo (Park), Marcus Tanksley (Mall), and Marcus Tanksley Jr. (Rain)

Mastered by Patricia Sullivan at Bernie Grundman Mastering, Hollywood, CA

Album Cover by Little Friends of Printmaking


THANK YOU TO:
Dannah Phirman, without whom none of this (nor Milo nor Eli) would be here, Ma!, Dad, The Tanksley family, "Weird Al" Yankovic, My SiriusXM KIDS PLACE LIVE! family: Mindy Thomas + Kenny Curtis + Jack Foreman + Tori Kerr + Christina Piazza, Robbie Schaefer (for bringing me into the world of kid music), Billy, James, Cindy, and Izzy, Steve & Beth Callaghan, Chris Hardwick, Paul & Storm, Ben Acker, Todd Cooper, Kate Micucci, Riki Lindhome, Ken Marino, Andrew & Polly, Jason Charles Miller, John Ross Bowie and Jamie Denbo, Ken Plume, Ethan Ulman, Full Van Fun, and Graham Cochrane at recordingrevolution.com for upping my studio game

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Track Name: You've Got What It Takes
You've got what it takes to be a kid
You're real small and you like to jump
You've got what it takes to be a kid
No one understands what you're saying
And you get out of bed at least a million times a night
You've got what it takes!

You've got what it takes to be a kid
You're super light and you barely eat
You've got what it takes to be a kid
You like to climb up a slide and stand in a seat
And you can wear a bright red pair of overalls anywhere
You've got what it takes!

You've got what it takes to be a kid
You've got bangs and you like to trace
You've got what it takes to be a kid
Total strangers want to squeeze your face
And when your teeth fall out no one says "yecch"
Everybody says "Yeah!"

You've got what it takes to be a kid
You've got what it takes to be a kid
You've got what it takes to be a kid
You've got what it takes to be a kid
(You've got what it takes!)
Track Name: I-C-A-N-T-S-P-E-L-L
I is for the eggs you eat
C is for the kangaroo with bouncy feet
A is for the otter in the sea
N is for the bird up in the tree
T is for the house made of sticks
S is for my favorite number, which is five
P is for tomato
E is also for tomato
L... why not! It's for tomato
And one more L for "That's the end"
What does that spell?
I don't know!
Track Name: Chicken Monkey Duck
Monkey chicken chicken,
Monkey Chicken, duck duck,
Chicken monkey monkey, Chicken Monkey,
chicken chicken monkey duck.
Monkey duck,
Chicken duck,
Monkey monkey duck duck,
Chicken Monkey, chicken chicken monkey,
“Chicken Monkey Duck.”

Chicken chicken monkey duck,
Chicken Monkey, duck duck,
Chicken chicken monkey,
Chicken monkey,
Chicken duck.
Chicken duck duck,
Chicken monkey monkey duck,
“Chicken Monkey Duck?”
Chicken duck.
Monkey duck duck:
Chicken chicken, monkey,
Chicken, monkey monkey, Chicken Monkey.
Chicken chicken monkey?
Chicken, monkey monkey,
“Chicken Monkey Duck.”

Chicken chicken, monkey,
“Chicken Monkey Duck.”
Chicken chicken, duck.
Chicken Monkey, monkey,
Chicken Monkey—chicken duck.

Duck, Chicken Monkey,
Chicken chicken monkey, chicken.
Duck duck,
Chicken chicken, duck.
Chicken, monkey monkey,
Chicken!

Duck duck, Chicken Monkey,
Chicken chicken, monkey.
Chicken Chicken (monkey monkey),
Chicken monkey,
“Chicken Monkey Duck.”

Chicken chicken chicken,
Monkey monkey,
Chicken Monkey:
Duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck,
“Goose.”
Track Name: What Makes the Breakfast?
The corn makes a flake for the breakfast
The fruit makes a shake for the breakfast
The flour and the baking soda makes a batter and the batter makes a pancake for the breakfast

(the batter makes a pancake for the breakfast)

The leaf makes a tea for the breakfast
The bean makes a coffee for the breakfast
The seed makes a bush, bush makes a berry, and the berry makes a jelly for the breakfast
"The seed makes a jelly for the breakfast?"
Well, the seed makes a bush, bush makes a berry, and the berry makes a jelly for the breakfast

(the seed makes a jelly for the breakfast)

The poppy makes a roll for the breakfast
The potter makes a bowl for the breakfast
The bakers bake a big, brown bread, take a blade and slice it up small for the breakfast

(the baker makes it small for the breakfast)

The pig makin' bacon for the breakfast
The pumpernickel make a bagel for the breakfast
The chicken makes a egg and the egg makes a chicken and the chicken makes a egg and the egg makes a chicken and the chicken make a egg and the egg make a chicken and the chicken make a egg for the breakfast... for the breakfast... for the breakfast!


Do do do do do do do do do do do
Everybody wanna know what's in the breakfast
What makes the breakfast?
Do do do do do do do do do do do
"Lunch and dinner, too?"
Eh.


The grain makes O's for the breakfast
Pit makes avocados for the breakfast
The tomatoes and the huevos and the chorizo make burritos for the breakfast

(yo make a burrito for the breakfast)

Take honey from the bees for the breakfast
Take salt from the seas for the breakfast
The farmer raise a cow and the cow make milk, and the milk make cheese for the breakfast
"The farmer makes cheese for the breakfast?"
Well, the farmer raise a cow, the cow makes milk, and the milk make cheese for the breakfast

(the farmer makes cheeeeese for the breakfast)

The O makes J for the breakfast
Dough makes a beignet for the breakfast
The mama says, "Stay," gives the food away, but the café make you pay for the breakfast

(Mama say don't you pay for breakfast)

The grease makes a donut for the breakfast
The trees make coconut for the breakfast
The gravity makes a sun and the sun makes a heat and the heat makes a cloud and the cloud makes rain and the rain makes a field and the field makes a oat and the oat makes granola for the breakfast... for the bre-
"Wait, the GRAVITY makes GRANOLA for the BREAKFAST?"

Well...
YES.


Do do do do do do do do do do do
Everybody wanna know what's in the breakfast
What makes the breakfast?
Do do do do do do do do do do do
"What's in sausage?"
Mmmm... don't ask.


But I know the oven makes heat for the breakfast
The wood makes a seat for the breakfast
The shredder shreds wheat for the breakfast
A little sugar makes it sweet for the breakfast
The cow and the pig and the goat and the goose
and the hog and the horse and the mouse and the moose
and the dog and the cat
and the bird and the bat
Everybody's gonna eat for the breakfast

"What about the ghost?"
The ghost eats nothing for the breakfast
"The ghost eats nothing for the breakfast?!"
Uh... the ghost eats toast for the breakfast
YEAH!  THE GHOST EATS TOAST FOR THE BREAKFAST!
Sure... the ghost eats toast for the breakfast!
Everybody knows that the ghost eats the toast for the breakfast!

Everybody knows that the ghost eats toast for the breakfast
(the ghost eats toast)
Everybody knows that ghosts eat toast for the breakfast
(the ghost eats toast)
Everybody knows that the ghost eats toast for the breakfast
(the ghost eats toast)
Everybody knows
Everybody knows
And everybody wants to know:
What makes the breakfast?
Track Name: Cat Cat Frog Frog
cat cat
frog frog
wild boar wild boar
lion lion
(repeat x3)

cat cat
frog frog
wild boar boar

EVERYBODY BOUNCE LIKE A

bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny
bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny
bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny
bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny
bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny
bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny
bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny
bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny bunny BUNNY

kitten kitten kitten kitten kitten kitten kitten kitten
kitten kitten kitten kitten kitten kitten kitten kitten
kitten kitten kitten kitten kitten kitten kitten kitten
kitten kitten kitten kitten kitten... grows up to be a

cat cat
frog frog
wild boar wild boar
lion lion

cat cat
frog frog
wild boar wild boar
got a piggy nose like a
bat bat
or a
hog hog
not a crocodile crocodile
nor an orca

bat bat
hog hog
crocodile crocodile

JUMP OUT OF THE WATER LIKE A

dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin dolphin

cat CAT!
frog FROG!
wild boar
LION!

cat cat
frog frog
wild boar
lion

cat cat
frog frog
wild boar (wild boooooar)
lion

cat cat
frog frog
wild boar
lion

CAT CAT
FROG FROG
WILD BOAR WILD BOAR
[sound of a huge, powerful lion roaring (unless that's too expensive to get in which case it'll probably just me making a little "rar" sound)]
Track Name: The Day
Good morning, good morning
Good morning, good morning
Good morning, good morning
and open the eyes
Good morning, good morning
get out of the bed
Good morning, good morning
go down to the kitchen for

Beans & eggs and beans & eggs
and eggs & beans and
Beans & eggs and beans & eggs
and milk & tea and
Beans & eggs and beans & eggs
and oil & butter and
Beans & eggs and beans & eggs
tomatoes & toast
and out the door to

Run & ride and run & ride
and ride and run and
Run & ride and run & ride
on heels & wheels and
Run & ride and run & ride
and eat a burrito and
Run & ride and run & ride
go back inside to

Take a nap and take a nap and take a nap
Take a nap and take a nap and *SNORE*
Take a nap and take a nap and take a nap
Take a nap and take a nap and take a nap
and waking up to

Bounce & jump and bounce & jump
and jump & bounce and
Bounce & jump and bounce & jump
and jump in a puddle and
Bounce & jump and bounce & jump
and +BOING BOING+
Bounce & jump and bounce & jump
go in and sit down for

Carrots & broccoli, carrots & broccoli
broccoli carrots and
Carrots & broccoli, carrots & broccoli
rice & fish
Carrots & broccoli, carrots & broccoli
broccoli carrots and
Carrots & broccoli, carrots & broccoli
finish it all and get
ICE CREAM!

Read a book and read a book
and soak in the bubbles
Read a book and read a book
and clean the teeth
Read a book and read a book
get under the covers and
Sing a song and sing a song
Turn out the light
Good night!
Track Name: Armpits
Little eyes, little nose
Little legs, little toes
Little shoulders, little elbows, just below armpits

Little ears, little hips
Little fingers, little fingertips
Little sides, little ribs, just below armpits!

[Dance it out]

Little leg, little shin
Little cheeks, little chin
Little hair, little skin, on little ARMPITS!

Little pinky, little thumb
Little back, little bum
Little calves, little tummy, just below ARMPITS!!


WAIT! Stop tickling me!
You clearly have the advantage.
But one day, I'll be big and strong, and I will-


Little ankles, little knees
Little that, little these
Little pat, little squeeze, and little...

Little head, little face
Little neck, little waist
Little hand, little other hand hanging from...

(Run for it!)

ARMPITS!!!
Track Name: Banana Said Whoops
The banana said "Whoops!" and it fell on the floor
And everybody said, "Hey, pick banana up, or
if it was on purpose let it stay lying down."
"I think banana didn't mean to fall," said a clown.
"And this is just a thing that you are guessing?" asked a crow.
"Actually, it's not—I said, 'I think,' but meant, 'I know.'
See just before banana had its slipping accident,
It said a word that let me know this wasn't what was meant.
When the thing you do's intended, 'Whoops!' ain't what you say.
You'd go, 'Oh Good!' or 'Great!' or 'Nice!' or 'Fine!' or just 'Ok!'
And so I posit to you all that we should help it stand.
We're duty bound to circle round and lend our friend a hand."
But when they turned to help their pal, they saw no sign of it.
"We spoke too long, banana's gone."
'Twas true—banana split.
Track Name: In Your Biz
Hey, you know what would be fun? Let’s go out into the neighborhood and find out what people do. It’s time to play “What’s in Your Biz!"

Hey, neighborhood scientist! What’s in YOUR biz?
"My biz?"
Yeah, like what’s going on in your world? In your business?
"Oh, well science"
There is science in your biz
There is science in your biz
There is science in your biz
There is science in your biz
There is science in your biz
There is science in your biz

Hey, gardener! What’s in YOUR biz?
(shouting) "My what?!"
Your biz!
"Bliz?"
BIZ! Can you turn that off?
(turns off music)
No, not the music! The weed whacker.
(Music on, weed whacker off)
OK! Garder, what’s in your biz?
"Weed whackin’?"
Nice!
There’s whackin' weeds in your biz
There’s whackin' weeds in your biz
There’s weed whackin' in your biz
There’s whackin' weeds in your biz
There’s whackin' weeds in your biz
There’s weed whackin' in your biz

Hey, person in a movie theater! What’s in YOUR biz?
“Shhhh!"
I'm sorry, say that again?
"SHHH."
Oh!
There's "SHHH" in your biz
There's "SHHH" in your biz
There's "SHHH" in your biz
There's "SHHH" in your biz
There's "SHHH" in your biz
There's "SHHH" in your biz

Movin' on! Hopefully to somewhere a little less cranky...

Hey, doctor performing surgery in a hospital! What’s in YOUR biz?
“Sir, you cannot be in here. You need to leave right now.”
There’s making me leave in your biz
There’s making me leave in your biz
There’s kicking me out of your biz
There’s making me leave in your biz
There’s making me leave in your biz
There’s removing me from your biz
No need to push! I’m on my way!

Hey look it’s a fire truck. I’d love to ask what’s in their biz, but they’re probably way too busy to st—
There’s fire in our biz
There’s fire in our biz
There’s fire in our biz (and rescue!)
There’s fire in our biz
There’s fire in our biz
There’s fire in our biz
And heroism...

WOW.
Well, time for one more. Hey little boy! How old are you?
"I'm four."
Four years old, you’re so big! What’s in YOUR biz?
"Playing the marimba"
You play the marimba—oh, that’s so cute. You want to play a little of it for me?
"Ok"
Yeah? OK, I’ll count you in. Ready? One, tw—
* * * marimba solo * * *
Bro! You're a LEGEND! High five! /CRACK/ OW!
"You want me to play more?"
I'd love to but the bit's over. We gotta end the song. And I think you just broke my hand.
"But what's in your biz?"
What's in MY biz? Isn't it obvious???
There’s in your biz in my biz
There’s in your biz in my biz
There’s in your biz in my biz
There’s in your biz in my biz
There’s in your biz in my biz
There's your biz in my biz
“OUR BIZ IS IN HIS BIZ”
Your biz is in my bi—
"SHHHHHH!!"
Track Name: Dance, Little Meatball, Dance
You're beef, you're pork, and you're bread crumbs
You're garlic, you're salt, and you're onion
You're a little cheesy cause there is cheese in you
You're a little eggy cause there's an egg or two
I put it all in a bowl and mix you through and through and through and through

I form you in my hand
I throw you in a pan
I turn the flame up and it's time
To dance, little meatball

Dance (a)round, little meatball
Dance like you own this town, little meatball
Shake your ground round around, little meatball
Get ready, get ready, get ready, get ready, NOW!

Dance, little meatball, dance (dance, little meatball)
Dance, little meatball, dance (dance, little meatball)
Dance, little meatball, dance (dance, little meatball)
Dance, little meatball, dance!

You're hip, you're hot, and you're ready
You've reached the top of spaghetti
You smell a bit like a meaty bowl of stew
You've got a million bumps all over you
You're so much more than a greasy little sphere
You're a greasy little superstar

You are glistening
But are you listening
cause, meatball, here's the thing: It's time...
To dance, little meatball

Dance (a)round, little meatball
Come on, jump up and down, little meatball
You are a quarter pound, little meatball
Here we go now, 1... 2... 1-2-3-COME ON!

Dance, little meatball, dance (dance, little meatball)
Dance, little meatball, dance (dance, little meatball)
Dance, little meatball, dance (dance, little meatball)
Dance, little meatball, dance!

Meatballs! All over the world!
Italian!
Swedish!
German!
¡Albondigas!
Chef Boyardee!
IKEA!
What the heck! Matzah balls, get in there! Let me see you move!

FADE OUT!!
Track Name: Never Gonna Happen
It's never never never never never gonna happen
No, no way
It's never never never never never gonna happen
No, no way
It's never never never never never gonna happen
No, no way
It's never never never never never gonna happen
No, no way

It's never (never)
It's never (never)
It's never (never)
It's never never

No.
No.
No.
No.

Never (never)
Never (never)

No. No. No. No.

Not. A. Chance.

It's never never never never never gonna happen
No, no way (no no way... NO!)
It's never never never never never gonna happen
No, no way

[are you still reading these?]

It's never never never never never gonna happen
No, no way

It's never never never never never gonna happen
Never never never never never gonna happen
It's never never never never never gonna happen

No...
No...
Track Name: Baby Is Going to Sleep
Shhh...
Little baby is going to sleep
Little baby is going to sleep
Little baby is going to sleep
Little baby is going to sleep

Little baby is going to sleep
Little baby is going to sleep
Little baby is going to sleep
Little baby is going to sleep

Little baby is going to sleep
Little baby is going to sleep
Little baby is going to sleep
Little baby's going to sleep someday
Track Name: Diaper Song
I look at you, you look at me
We take your diaper off so we can see
If there's anything that needs to be cleaned
And, nope, you got no poop, you got no pee

I look at you, you look at me
We take your diaper off so we can see
If there's anything that needs to be cleaned
And, nope, you got no poop... but you got some pee

I look at you, you look at me
We take your diaper off so we can see
If there's anything that needs to be cleaned
And- OOOHHH UCCCHHH

Kid...
You got the poop (you got the poop)
You got the poop (you got the poop)
You got the poop
You got the poop, you got the poop

You got the poop (you got the poop)
You got the poop (you got the poop)
You got the poop (you got the poop)
You got the poop (you got the poop)
You got the poop (you got the poop)
You got the WHAT? (you got the...)
Poop (poop)
Poop (poop)
Poop (poop)
Poop (poop)
Poooooooooooooop

SO MUCH.

Poooooooooooooooooooooooooop
Track Name: Use Your Imagination
You can be an astronaut
You can be a big robot
You can be a cop or not
The choice is up to you

You've got a special place inside
Where nothing is too strange to hide
Rocks can talk

"They can?"

Nope! I lied!
And so can you when you choose to 'cause

You can use your imagination
Swing away cause you can't miss
You can use your imagination
To come up with cool thoughts like this:

a worm with wings

AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If you could look within your mind
What's the weirdest thing you'd find?
A picture of some ham that's signed,
"All the best, Some Ham"

Use it to explore the deep
Use it to name your horse Phillipe
"Ewes" is another way to say "sheep"
Now that power's in your hands (power's in your hands)

You can be a team of cars and planes
from outer space
And when there's danger
they transform into
Vegetables
(Vegetables!)
(Vegetables!)

* * *carrots and broccoli* * *

You can use your imagination
You don't need to waste a wish
You can use your imagination
To come up with cool thoughts like thish:

a bowling ball driving a dump truck

ALRIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You can soar on the wings of a flightless bird
You can snore louder than anyone has ever heard

[seismic snore]

Wake up!
Your!

I-magination
I-MA-gination
Ima-GI-nation
Imagi-NATION
I-magination
I-MA-gination
Imagi-NATION
Imagina-TION
(You can... use your... imagination)

You can use your imagination
Possibilities are possible!
You can use your imagination
To come up with cool thoughts like this:

a language that only uses the letters 'D' and 'P', and when they say, "D d d d d d pp d ddd pppp d p d p d p d ddd pppp p pppp p dd p p p p p," they're saying:

You can use your imagination
The song is done
that's all there is
But you can use your imagination
to come up with cool songs
(come up with cool songs)
come up with cool songs! like! this!